"Mummy, where do babies come from?"
As I swerved past an innocent cyclist, my brain went through a variety of possible answers. Was my nearly-5 year old (not to mention ears-agog-3-year-old) ready for a graphic Biology lesson or should I be weaving her fantastical stories of Storks and Cabbage patches...?
Cooly as I could (and aware that whatever I said now would be recited back to me in years to come...Daughter has the memory of a super-computer), I selected the most-truthful-but-not-too-detailed reply. Something about eggs and seeds...tra la la..."and then the baby grows in the Mummy's tummy for 9 whole months! Imagine that darling, we were waiting 9 months for you to grow into a little baby...".
I rabbited on a little longer, hoping that my mindless chatter would distract from any detailed questioning about where these eggs and seeds came from exactly...or how on earth they fused together to create another human being.
But of course, I should have forseen that the next question would be...
"So how does the baby come out of the Mummy's tummy??"
Glossing over the fact that both my babes were sun-roof extractions (against my sincerest wishes and efforts), I referred back to a recent-ish farm trip where my children were utterly disgusted to see lambs being born from a sheep's, er, bottom.
We then had to go through every animal a 3 and 5 year old are familiar with to confirm they were also born by this gruesome method. We did cats, dogs, cows, horses, guinea pigs, hamsters and so on. And on. And on.
I was grateful to have a temporary diversion to the bird genus and talk about real, tangible, shell-cracking eggs.
But we were soon back to mammals.
It was only at the end of the journey that my son wanted to know how stones are born. Which completely stumped me. How do you answer that??
We've done our first Biology lesson. Next up, Geology. I can't wait for the next car journey.
you're so right, you have got to be so careful how to reply to these questions because they remember everything!
ReplyDeleteI am terrified about what is going to start coming out of betty's mouth
Elsie - It's amazing isn't it? I guess their brains are less cluttered up with decades of STUFF so their memories are wonderfully unsullied and crystal clear. Mind you, it can be useful...Daughter can be relied on to provide names of only-met-once people or their children when we're out and about and often reminds me of things I've forgotten when we're shopping. It's just a bit embarrassing to have to ask one's 4 year old for advice!
ReplyDeleteHaha. Thank god for the emergency c-section on this end, too. I will tell little L just how it was - bet that will keep her from having sex too early ;-)
ReplyDeleteI thought I was doing so well on this, having told my son (most of) the facts age three. Until he pointed at my very pregnant belly with a few stretch marks, and asked "So when the baby is born, do you get a really big crack in your belly?" Time for a refresher course, I think.
ReplyDeleteMet Mum - hee hee. It is funny to see how utterly grossed out they are by the realities of birth. My son was quite traumatised by the farm visit with all its blood, guts and goo!!
ReplyDeleteMwa - Bless him. I must say, I got so huge with both my pregnanices that I actually thought that might happen too! And in a way it did, just with a little medical intervention...
We're having this conversation a lot at the moment, particularly with No. 3 starting to look very evident the old 'how is the baby going to get out' conversation is a standard.
ReplyDeleteBTW - we're on the island first week of August. Are you guys around?x
Pants - :-)
ReplyDeleteOoh ooh ooh (still not used to your new blog name) , 1st week of August...YES! Please come and see us. We move house 29th July so will be in certain amount of chaos and stress but I would love to meet up. I'll e-mail you my new address and contact numbers. How exciting!!!!!!!!